Life...

Do you ever have times in your life when you think that it is impossible to do all that is before you? I am feeling that way tonight...wait, who am I kidding, I've been feeling that way since January!

I feel behind...with you, my faithful readers; with my family; with friends; with ministry. And maybe the biggest part of the problem is that I feel behind with God. I hate that! Why does God seem to be the first thing I push down on my daily list and yet He's the one thing that would truly help me in all the other areas??? It's not just tasks that seem hard lately either. Being with God has been hard. Listening to God has been hard.

Every day I tell God that I'm not sure I can do the things He is asking me to do. And every day, I am reminded that I definitely CANNOT do the things He's asking of me, but that He never expected me to do them.

There's not a huge epiphany coming here. No, mostly I just needed to tell you that, like you, not every day is easy. But following Christ is definately worth it. I thought maybe you could pray for me and I could pray for you. What should we pray? Well, it's funny because I have this verse taped to my bookshelf next to my bed. It's a verse that another staff person, this summer, encouraged me to meditate on and pray through.

"My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip-- he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Istrael will neither slumber nor sleep." - Psalm 121: 2-4

Isn't that a great word from the Lord? I thought so too! Okay, friend, thanks for your listening ear. Have a great day and I'll be back soon.

Remember, I'm praying for you!

Just one of those days...

"We could keep meeting but I just don't see the point. I mean, I enjoy talking about this stuff but I don't think I will ever change my mind about God." said Nichole as I sat across from her and her roommate in their dorm room. Colleen, one of my staff team members, and I first met Nichole a week ago today. She had come to the Porn Nation event and requested a book written by the speaker at the event so we had gone to her room last week to drop it off.

When we dropped the book off we asked if we could ask her thoughts on a few questions which began a conversation that we picked up again today. Last week Nichole had told us that she liked controversy and enjoys talking about religion with people but warned us that people can get mad at her. I assurred her that I wasn't in this for an argument and that I have heard almost everything from people when it comes to God. At one point last week I said this to her, "If you could know a relationship with someone who loves you and wants to know you and is more than a set of rules, would you want to learn more about a God like that?" She said she would love to hear about our thoughts and would love to hear why God is important to us. When we left her room last Thursday we were very hopeful and encouraged by this open door into her life.

To be honest, today, as I walked over to her dorm, I didn't feel as hopeful. I was worried she wouldn't be there and that she would decide not to talk with us. Basically I had very little faith that anything would happen today. BUT, thankfully I serve a God who is much bigger than my mind allows Him to be. Not only was she there, but so was her roommate AND they were expecting us! What??? They invited us into their dorm room and we sat down and heard a little about Brianna's background and her thoughts on God. Then we dove right in. Nichole had a lot of questions and I tried to answer as honestly as I could. They both let us in to pain they've experienced in their past. Nichole asked us toward the end of our conversation, "What is the benefit of a relationship with God?" Colleen and I both shared about what a relationship with God brought to our lives and the girls were pretty engaged.

Sadly though, at the end, I felt like they were closing the door on further discussion. I've been sad about it all afternoon because I genuinely like these girls! I would love to get to know them and be in their life but we don't have their permission for that at this point so I will pray for them. It was heartbreaking to hear the pain and to know that God so desperately wants to meet them in that but He can't do that unless they let Him. Would you join me in praying for these girls? This is just an example of the "hard" part of my job. I have to watch people I like walk away from God whom I love. If it breaks my heart, someone who just met these girls a week ago, just imagine what it does to the One who created them. Please pray.